Up Endoscope!
Most of my friends are in their mid-30s, and therefore have more than a decade to go before their recommended colonoscopy at age 50. Once anyone reaches that age, I highly recommend following the medical community's advice to have one done. To ease anyone's fears, I'll tell you all about the preparation in light of the scoping I had yesterday (my third).
First, you are supposed to pick up some meds that help "clean out" your digestive tract. There are a couple different kinds available. Suprep is the more expensive one (it cost me $45 even with insurance), but in my experience it's easier on the system and is worth the cost.
Then, the day before the colonoscopy you go on a clear liquid diet. You can probably have a normal breakfast, but afterward you can only have things like apple juice, Jell-o, Sprite, and chicken broth. No juice with any kind of pulp, nothing with red or purple coloring. In my opinion this is the most challenging part.
In the evening before your procedure you take the first dose of the prep. In the package is a 16-oz tumbler. You empty one bottle of the prep stuff in the cup, then add water until is gets to the 16-0z line. Then you drink it. This is the worst part of the whole thing, because it's this horrible sort of super sweet flavor, maybe cherry or something. It's hard to describe, but it's awful. Then over the next hour you have to drink two more 16-oz cups of water.
Sometime between 20 minutes and a couple hours later, you feel the need to use the bathroom. You'll go several times over the next few hours. This is where the Suprep is better than the other brands, because it doesn't make your stomach hurt or anything. You just use the bathroom as normal.
The next part varies according to your doctor and the time of your procedure. For me, checking into the hospital at 7:30 a.m., I had to get up at 3:30 and take the second dose of the prep, the same way as the first. This is especially hard because you remember the horrible taste of the stuff the first time.
Again, over the next few hours you will go to the bathroom a bunch of times. Eventually there's nothing solid left in you, and you're passing liquid, which is a strange feeling but doesn't hurt or anything.
You go check into the hospital as directed, and you change into a hospital gown with nothing else on. your clothes are stored in a bag with your name on it (they tell you to wear loose clothes and not bring any valuables). You sit on the bed and they cover you with a blanket, then start an IV. You'll probably need to go to the bathroom again as the prep continues moving through your body.
When the doctor is ready, they wheel your bed into the room for the procedure. You meet the people who will soon become intimately acquainted with your nether regions, and they position you on your left side. Then they give you the sedation and you drift peacefully off to sleep.
Some people may remember voices or something of the procedure itself, but I never have. I've always awakened after it's over, and they wheel you back to your room. It takes maybe half an hour before you feel fully awake. The doc may come in and give you a brief overview of any buried treasure or anything interesting they found, the nurse removes your IV, and you change back into your clothes. You'll use the bathroom a couple times, but it's mostly air that needs to come out. You'll probably have a bit of blood too, since they tend to take biopsies while they are in there.
You're not allowed to drive for the rest of the day, so someone either has to come with you or pick you up. I drive myself there and have Katie come get me, and then we just go get the car the next day. The best way to clear the anesthesia is to go home and nap for a couple hours, and then you are starving and really want food. The first bite of whatever you eat tastes amazing. You feel a little weird and bloated as food begins moving through your digestive tract again, but it's temporary.
Anyway, that's about it. If you actually read this far, congratulations! You're ready to get probed.
First, you are supposed to pick up some meds that help "clean out" your digestive tract. There are a couple different kinds available. Suprep is the more expensive one (it cost me $45 even with insurance), but in my experience it's easier on the system and is worth the cost.
Then, the day before the colonoscopy you go on a clear liquid diet. You can probably have a normal breakfast, but afterward you can only have things like apple juice, Jell-o, Sprite, and chicken broth. No juice with any kind of pulp, nothing with red or purple coloring. In my opinion this is the most challenging part.
In the evening before your procedure you take the first dose of the prep. In the package is a 16-oz tumbler. You empty one bottle of the prep stuff in the cup, then add water until is gets to the 16-0z line. Then you drink it. This is the worst part of the whole thing, because it's this horrible sort of super sweet flavor, maybe cherry or something. It's hard to describe, but it's awful. Then over the next hour you have to drink two more 16-oz cups of water.
Sometime between 20 minutes and a couple hours later, you feel the need to use the bathroom. You'll go several times over the next few hours. This is where the Suprep is better than the other brands, because it doesn't make your stomach hurt or anything. You just use the bathroom as normal.
The next part varies according to your doctor and the time of your procedure. For me, checking into the hospital at 7:30 a.m., I had to get up at 3:30 and take the second dose of the prep, the same way as the first. This is especially hard because you remember the horrible taste of the stuff the first time.
Again, over the next few hours you will go to the bathroom a bunch of times. Eventually there's nothing solid left in you, and you're passing liquid, which is a strange feeling but doesn't hurt or anything.
You go check into the hospital as directed, and you change into a hospital gown with nothing else on. your clothes are stored in a bag with your name on it (they tell you to wear loose clothes and not bring any valuables). You sit on the bed and they cover you with a blanket, then start an IV. You'll probably need to go to the bathroom again as the prep continues moving through your body.
When the doctor is ready, they wheel your bed into the room for the procedure. You meet the people who will soon become intimately acquainted with your nether regions, and they position you on your left side. Then they give you the sedation and you drift peacefully off to sleep.
Some people may remember voices or something of the procedure itself, but I never have. I've always awakened after it's over, and they wheel you back to your room. It takes maybe half an hour before you feel fully awake. The doc may come in and give you a brief overview of any buried treasure or anything interesting they found, the nurse removes your IV, and you change back into your clothes. You'll use the bathroom a couple times, but it's mostly air that needs to come out. You'll probably have a bit of blood too, since they tend to take biopsies while they are in there.
You're not allowed to drive for the rest of the day, so someone either has to come with you or pick you up. I drive myself there and have Katie come get me, and then we just go get the car the next day. The best way to clear the anesthesia is to go home and nap for a couple hours, and then you are starving and really want food. The first bite of whatever you eat tastes amazing. You feel a little weird and bloated as food begins moving through your digestive tract again, but it's temporary.
Anyway, that's about it. If you actually read this far, congratulations! You're ready to get probed.
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