Anachronisms

Today I heard two phrases which made me wonder if I had traveled back to 1995:
"Whaddup?" and "Peace out."

We Should Probably Have This Looked At

Katie walked into the room the other day to find that Sam had done this to his sister:

That's the bulb from a baster. He discovered a while back that he could squeeze it and make it stick to his own face, and then he decided to share that joy of discovery with his sister. I can't wait to see how things like this play out once she's old enough to defend herself.

Spa-toola or Spa-chula?

I think we have four spatulas in our kitchen ( I admit I failed to properly research this topic by counting, but I can distinctly think of four). I feel a little guilty about it. Do we really need all those spatulas? How many things need to be turned over at once? Should I donate one or two to a third-world country where kids have to grow up in a world without spatulas? We are indeed fortunate to live in a place where these wonderful utensils are in rich supply. The next time you are cooking pancakes, eggs, or grilled cheese sandwiches, take a moment to spare a thought for those who aren't as fortunate.

How many spatulas do you have?

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What is your favorite punctuation mark and why?

Alarming Clock

It's not just smoke detectors anymore. Somehow a clock in the baby's room has been set to go off at 4 a.m. And it's a weird little clock without any clear method for disarming the alarm, so it took me 10 minutes to turn it off this morning.

Day 10

I have never felt better.

My vision is clearer, the very air
Is sweeter, and there is a
Spring in my
Step.

Dinner last night was tempting, with delicious chocolate cake being
Offered. But I resisted, and
Now I feel free.
Under no circumstances will I find myself
Taking the last eclair.
Success!

So, as difficult as it has been,
Everybody should try to reduce their sugar intake
Now and then.
Don't you think?

Happy with the way it is going, I recommend it to
Everyone. I think this experiment will have a
Lasting effect on my life.
Perhaps you should try it too.

On My Kitchen Counter

A street hockey ball

A tube of super glue

A ball of rubber bands

A travel alarm clock

A lighter for the gas grill

A roll of duct tape

Two watches with dead batteries

A basket of light bulbs

Confession de Mayo

I like to read articles that discuss quantum physics, in the vain hope that someday I'll understand such concepts as Heisenberg's uncertainty principle and Bell's inequality. Seriously, how can observing a particle affect its quantum state?

Which reminds me, when I get a cat I'm going to have to name it Schrodinger.

Day 3

There are some Rolos on the kitchen counter. After a couple hours they are audibly calling my name. I refuse to acknowledge the voices, for fear the Skittles will think I'm crazy.

I awoke from a lovely dream of eating Twizzlers this morning to find a shoelace missing from my sneakers. I suspect it was the fun-size Snickers that knocked on the door last night, asking for a glass of water.