For some reason, as I was falling asleep last night, I began to wonder what my own personal hell would be like. Here’s what I’ve come up with so far: It would be really windy, all the time, and super hot and humid. Everybody, including me, would be renamed Dakota (Sorry to anybody who likes that name, if any of those people can read, but it’s my hell, not yours). I would be forced to listen to muzak versions of really bad jazz while cashiering endlessly. I would have to wear a Hot Dog on a Stick uniform, and every customer would be buying really sharp objects like porcupines and bits of broken glass. There wouldn’t be a bar code on anything, and whenever the line got down to one person a hundred more people would come up at once and start yelling at me to speed up. What would your hell be like? [ Update : One more thing that would happen is everyone would copy me . Just kidding, Jer.]
Comments
In N Out
There's something nice about going somewhere for fast food that isn't so cookie-cutter. It's different. It's rare. Will I drive 30 miles out of my way to go? No. Will I go 5 miles? Yes.
HDTV
DON'T knock it till you've tried it. Ever since I went HD, there's no turning back. Especially watching football, everything else looks like CRAP. Don't be jealous that you can't afford a TV that's less than 17 years old.
Hybrid Cars
Ok, I'll give you this one...
Diet Coke
2 months. 40 pounds. 'Nuff said.
Musicals
Now you have angered the bald one. (Not very hard to do, I admit) Musicals are the ultimate form of stage performance. Plays are boring. Musicals are fun. I hate you and everything you stand for.
Convertibles
Again with the blasting of something just because you can't have one. Ok, in Utah, yes. Convertibles are a bad idea. If you live somewhere that doesn't ever snow, however, they're awesome. You obviously have never flown down the highway at 80mph with the top down.